Monday, 17 December 2012

Pome of the Day - Plebgate

"We have made clear that there should be no revenge attacks"
- Andrew Mitchell on the rebuilding of post-Ghadaffi Libya.

The Tories Chief Whip
Had to say 'Toodle Pip!!!'
After a night on the piss
He gave Plod some lip

'You fucking plebs!!!' he's alleged to have screamed
'Don't you know who I am? - You're gonna get creamed'
'The law's for the peasants, not us, the esteemed'

'I don't care who you are' said Plod with a grin
You can't cut through Downing Street
Stinking of gin
At 4 in the morning, may I ask where you've bin?'

But the story got out and although he denied
The use of strong language, the press took Plod's side
And another of Dave's posh chums
Had to swallow his pride
Delusions of grandeur, sadly denied

But what's this I hear on the news just today?
Mr.Plod got suspended albeit on full pay
A mystery witness confirmed Plod had lied
Ain't that just like a posh boy
To be spiteful and snide

Thursday, 13 December 2012

Pome of the Day - What's up, Guv?

An ugly frog prince known as Gove
Holds the Guinness Book of Records Record on hypocrisy, by Jove!!
His strike-breaking zeal
Would seem much more real
Has he forgotten his time manning the stove?

(I suppose it depends on your POV
Or perhaps he now drinks too much Soave)


Pome of the Day

I've been inspired for many months now by the 'Letter a Day to No.10' Facebook blog written by 'Keith Ordinary Guy'. Each day Keith writes a physical letter which he posts to David Cameron in which he exposes the lies, deceit and plain inhumanity that Ca-Moron's policies are having, particularly with regard to their effects on the lowest tier of society. They are darkly humourous, hard-hitting and very angry. Needless to say, Ca-Moron has yet to reply. Highly recommended.

Another good FB friend Ged,introduced me to the wondrously talented musician Katy Anchant who I discovered, has recently adopted a similar tactic, though in her case, she writes posing as a young woman besotted with Cameron and his policies in her daily 'Letter to David'. She also physically writes and posts these letters to him.
Katy mines a very rich vein of outrageous satire and her missives are another daily delight for me.

Meanwhile, Susan, another good American FB friend had sparked back to life my love of limericks and we spent a joyful evening shortly before the USA elections trading verses taking the piss out of various putative and actual world leaders.

Hence my recent decision to try to write a Pome a Day reflecting on recent news. Mainly of course, I hope to take some skilful potshots at the despicable bunch of cretins* that call themselves the government of this country.

I'll try to gather both the international limericks that started this off, along with my early attempts aimed at the national stage - which I've been publishing on my FB page - and eventually post links to everything from this blogpost.

* I apologise to all genuine cretins who may quite rightfully be incensed with being compared with this bunch of *******!s **

** The Guild of Asterisks confirm that no *'s were harmed in the production of this blog
Mon 17 Dec
Pome of the Day - Plebgate